I breath a sigh of relief because I have finally gotten over you.
I no longer have the hope and faith that we are meant to be. Because if we are, it would have not gotten to this point. If we are, I didn’t have to succumb to your conditions. Crazy conditions. Constant conditions. If we are, I didn’t have to beg for respect. I wouldn’t have to plead for loyalty, for honesty and commitment. There would be no lies, no mistrust because there wouldn’t have been a reason NOT to trust.
It took me some time to completely walk away. To know that you are simply not the person that would lead me to greatness.Because the man that will eventually be my partner-in-crime will have my back. For 6 years, I was so blind that I did not see the subtle signs. Love does that to you, unfortunately. But fortunately, life gives you a second chance.
My second chance came when I least expected it. And to think that a complete stranger is responsible for shaking me out of this never ending nightmare. For making me realize (because I forgot) that I am worth something. That my head controls my heart. That yes, I do deserve better. That I am fucking amazing. And no one in this world can make me feel like I have to prove myself to be number 1, all the damn time. Thank you stranger.
And while I might never ever forgive you because you will never ever realize the extent to which you have managed to crush my soul, I thank you. I thank you for teaching me that devils can be disguised as the “guy next door”. I thank you for making me a strong ass bitch, because that is what I am indeed. And most of all, I thank her. I thank her for publicizing her times at your apartment, because if not for her, I would have been stuck at this fake ass party. I thank her because now I can give my love to someone else who deserves it. And she can have you. :)